Eric: I know what you're all thinking: this is all my fault!
Dungeon Master: No, Cavalier, you asked permission. [to Hank] And, upon asking, were granted permission, correct?
Dungeon Master: No, Cavalier, you asked permission. [to Hank] And, upon asking, were granted permission, correct?
— Dungeons & Dragons (1983), "Dungeon at the Heart of Dawn"
When someone does something that has a bad outcome, they have a tendency to blame themselves, often coming close to a Heroic BSoD or even approaching the Despair Event Horizon. They may even declare, "It's All My Fault!" Their belief may stem from a False Cause.
Before this can happen, though, someone will step in and point out that due to whatever circumstances, the person blaming themself either had no choice, or the situation legitimately wasn't their fault, or even if they were the one responsible, the outcome would have been the same even without their involvement. It might come from Accidental Injury Guilt if the person didn't have much to do with someone else getting injured.
Whether this is able to snap the person out of their downward spiral depends on how convincing the person trying to reassure them is, and often how truthful they are. Not to be confused with False Reassurance, where someone will try to reassure people with Exact Words and Loophole Abuse.
Often overlaps with Mistakes Are Not the End of the World and You Are Better Than You Think You Are.
Compare and contrast Not Me This Time when someone who usually causes problems is blamed, but can demonstrate they weren't actually involved in this instance.
Contrast Never My Fault when someone refuses to acknowledge any blame they may have. Also contrast Blaming the Victim.
Examples:
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Anime & Manga
- Fullmetal Alchemist: In a flashback, while being treated after the disastrous transmutation attempt, Ed blames himself for causing Alphonse to lose his body and believes he hates him for it, all while Pinako assures him that it wasn't his fault and Alphonse doesn't hold a grudge about it.
- Naruto: When Minato Namikaze realizes that his student, Obito Uchiha, was the masked man who attacked Konohagakure and threatened his son all those years ago, he blames himself for not realizing it sooner. The Yin half of Kurama within him points out that he had no way of knowing that the masked man was Obito, and even if he did, it wouldn't have made a difference. Minato had to save his village and family, and it's unlikely that Obito would have listened to reason.
Comic Books
- Tangle the Lemur from Sonic the Hedgehog (IDW) has a penchant for these.
- In Issue #24, Sonic finds Tangle herself infected with the Metal Virus just as the heroes are hitting rock bottom. He has a Heroic BSoD and blames himself for not properly dealing with Dr. Eggman or Metal Sonic earlier in the comic, allowing the former to unleash the Synthetic Plague, but Tangle assures him otherwise; Sonic had Tails disarm Metal before letting him go and Eggman re-weaponized him after his amnesia was cured by Dr. Starline, whose existence the heroes were unaware of until recently.
- In Issue #76, Jewel the Beetle breaks down in guilt and despair after Clutch the Opossum indirectly destroyed Restoration HQ during the Phantom Riders Story Arc, as his Evil Plan was enabled partly by the heroes' own mistakes. Tangle gives Jewel a Cooldown Hug and tells her not to kick herself just because Clutch's actions forced her to make a Sadistic Choice.
- The Legend of Korra: Ruins of the Empire: Kuvira had previously betrayed her adopted family, tried to take over the Earth Kingdom and reform it into the Earth Empire, and surrendered. When she was put on trial, she pleaded not guilty and insisted that she did all she could. Eventually, one of her former soldiers tried to take power. Kuvira assisted in taking him down and was humbled by what her actions cost so at the end of the story, she plead guilty, causing the heroes to forgive her and insisted that instead of impressing her, they reform her so she would be in house arrest her home city of Zaofu, when talking to her adoptive mother Suyin Beifong, Suyin admitted that she wondered if she was the cause of Kuvira's actions, to which Kuvira assured Suyin that she was responsible for her own actions and she was a great mother who took in an arrogant girl.
Fan Works
- Adventures of a Line Hopper:
- When Jack and Seo reunite in The Years that Never Were, Jack knows how much Seo blames herself for Jack leaving her and assures her that him leaving is his own fault and not hers.
- Butterflies: After Jenny rescues him from people who wants info on living Time Lords, Aychron assures her that this one is not her fault since she didn't choose to be created as a Time Lord.
- The Ten Seos: "The Story of the Eighth Seo" shows that a good amount of Jenny's mental healing process involves Seo reassuring her that all the murder Jenny did is the fault of the monster inside her head, not Jenny's.
- In Irkoli, after finding out how hard Seo took Dawn's anger for Buffy's "death", Dawn starts blaming herself for the death, but Ace asserts that it is Elizabeth's fault as it is part of her plot and not Dawn's fault or anyone else's.
- In Invasion of Hell, Part II: Dreamless, Buffy writes a pre-emptive reassurance In her letter for Seo, telling her Guilt Complex-laden daughter that she is not at fault for whatever Elizabeth does, even if it happens because she fell into Elizabeth's trap.
- Tartarus Gate:
- When Seo is upset that she can't use the mysterious reality-warping phenomenon to bring Buffy back from the dead, the Doctor and Jack reassure her that it's not her fault that her mother is "dead". Buffy, who sees the whole thing but can't be perceived by them, says the same thing to Seo and, since she can see that the Doctor is actually blaming himself, tries to tell the Doctor that it isn't his fault either.
- In chapter 11, after shutting down Seo's plan of using herself to stop the spores because it is too risky, the Doctor tells her that she doesn't have to keep risking her life seeking penance like that because what happened to Buffy or with the Cyberplanner isn't her fault to begin with.
- In the Sonic the Hedgehog fanfic Bird-Brained
, Scratch gets the wrong personality chip and begins to act like a feral wolf. He chases his friends and bites Kylie, and once she gives him the right chip, he feels horrible for having put his friends in danger like that. Kylie tells him that, if anything, she's to blame for having given him the incorrect chip.
- In the Sonic the Hedgehog fanfic Dear My Friend, Felicity dies as a result of smoke inhalation from a fire that happened in the garage. Tails blames himself for having accidentally started the fire (especially since Felicity gave her life to save him), but Kylie tells him it's her fault for not keeping a close eye on her. Sonic tells her it was out of her control. Later, Tails feels guilty again when Dr. Starline tries to bring Felicity back as one of his evil lackeys, but Sonic says this was Dr. Starline's decision, not his.
- Played with in Gerald the Gerbil, a fanfiction based on Wish Kid; Nick gets to take Gerald, his class' pet gerbil, home for the weekend. Gerald dies in his sleep, and although Nick is able to bring him back to life with a wish, the wish is temporary, and eventually, Gerald dies again. When Mel discovers that Gerald died, he comes to the conclusion that Gerald died in his sleep, since Nick would never do anything to hurt him, especially not on purpose. He assures Nick that Gerald's death wasn't his fault, to which Nick tells him,"You know it wasn't my fault, and I know it wasn't my fault, but Mrs. Kimberly and the rest of my classmates don't know that." Mel then assures Nick that sometimes these things happen, and it's nobody's fault; death is a perfectly natural thing.
- He Never Told You: Grace blames herself for Simon's death because she told him the lie about numbers being equal to power. The Cat points out to Grace that she and Simon both believed in a lie, and it got them into trouble, but whereas Grace eventually accepted she was wrong, Simon stubbornly refused to believe otherwise to the bitter end.
- In the Classic Disney Shorts fanfic High Sea Haunting, Cordelia possesses Kylie and makes her attack her friends. When Kylie manages to break free of her control, she apologizes for putting her friends in peril. Goofy tells her it's not her fault, as she wasn't herself.
- In the Tom and Jerry fanfic The Hostile Haunting, Tom is possessed by a ghost and he chases after Peony and Jerry. Once he's freed, he feels rather bad about having put his loved ones in danger, but Peony reassures him that it was out of his control since he wasn't himself. Later, Peony gets possessed and feels terrible about having clawed Tom in the face, and he tells her that he doesn't hold it against her since she couldn't control herself.
- Iris Hawthorne: Ace Attorney: In "Turnabout Family", Maya initially blames herself for Diego Armando's death because she channelled Dahlia, who then killed him. At the end, when it turns out the channelling was faked because Dahlia is still alive, Diego assures Maya that it wasn't her fault.
- Just this once (everybody lives):
- In Inextricable, Jack blames himself after Ianto is shot dead in the crossfire between him and several traders in alien artefacts, feeling like he could have been quicker in stopping it. Upon reviving, Ianto is very quick to reassure him that it wasn't his fault.
- In Take my heart, pull it apart, Ianto is captured and used as an immobile quantum computer, a process which was very painful to him and lasted for just over four years. When Jack saves him with the help of John Hart, Jack blames himself for not being able to save Ianto sooner - however, Ianto assures him that it wasn't his fault and that unlike Ianto, he didn't have MoreSight to help him. Jack also blames himself for letting Ianto die from the violent removal of him from the system he was wielded to, but Ianto also points out that, considering the painful process of resurrecting and recovering from that, dying was the better option.
- Kaleidoscopic Katamari:
- The Star of Damocles sees Dipp taking advantage of a young fan's belief that he's the real Prince of All Cosmosnote . He winds up being kidnapped, and blames himself for both that and Foomin getting batted out of the air during the rescue. Both Ace and the Prince attempt to convince him he's not responsible for what happened; unfortunately, Ace's rather blunt approach only makes matters worse.
- Star-Struck continues exploring the fallout, with Foomin telling him point-blank that she's not interested in Blaming the Victim.
- Let Nothing Fall to Chance: While examining Hoover's body, Six realizes that the victim was killed by A Light Shining in Darkness, silently berating himself for letting the pistol fall into murderous hands. Croissant assures him that it's not his fault.
- Night of the Vampurr: Once Yuki has gone back to normal (as she spent most of the story being a vampurr), Mayu apologizes because she blames herself for Yuki's transformation. Yuki says that it was an accident, and besides, she needs to apologize too for not telling anyone about her recent transformations.
- The The WereCleaner fanfic Night Shift Nightmare has a few examples:
- Daryl is devastated when Abby is killed in a forklift mishap. He feels guilty and blames himself for having been too busy looking for a mysterious creature. Kyle tells him that he just wanted to keep everyone safe, and he wasn't the one who made her drive a forklift when she didn't know how to. Sadly, this doesn't work, as Daryl blames Kyle for Abby's death when he learns that he is the creature he's been looking for.
- Daryl is hellbent on killing Kyle to avenge Abby, only to fall to his death from a window. Kyle attempts to catch him, but he is too late, and he blames himself for having failed to save him. Cameron reminds him that Daryl was too far gone. Andie says that this is all Mr. Howl's fault, as he indirectly killed her by making her drive a forklift despite her lack of experience.
- In the Bug Fables fanfic The Price of Silk, after the pheromone assault that mind-controlled Kabbu into attacking his friends, Isau tries to reassure the beetle that nobody blames him for his actions and that he was able to avoid succumbing to the additional affects for long enough to be taken to safety was quite the feat in itself. Vi and Leif later tell Kabbu the same thing and that they are simply worried about him. Unfortunately, Kabbu's Chronic Self-Deprecation means it takes a good amount of time for him to really believe that he's not to blame.
- Season Of Mists: In The High Cost of Living, Ianto assures Jack that him dying, resurrecting, and his ordeal in the Valiant and the Project were not his fault.
- Sleeper Hit AU (My Hero Academia): When Ashido Mina/Alien Queen first meets Midoriya Izuku/Sleeper Hit in the field, she apologises for the role she thinks she played in him being expelled from UA four years earlier. Despite his lingering resentment of the Hell Class and the assumptions he had made about Ashido at the time, Midoriya makes a point of telling her he doesn't blame her for Aizawa's actions.
- In the Sonic the Hedgehog fanfic A Whisper in the Dark, Big feels remorseful because he bit Whisper and she's now a werewolf. Whisper understands and reassures him that it wasn't his fault since Wendy had brainwashed him.
Films — Animation
- Played With in Aladdin and the King of Thieves. After Cassim and Iago get caught trying to steal from the palace, Aladdin blames himself for even allowing his father in. Genie assures him he did nothing wrong in trying to show his father a better life, but adds that leaving him alone with Iago was a very stupid move.
Aladdin: The Oracle was right. My dad was trapped in the world of the Forty Thieves. Trapped by his own greed. I was so stupid to think I could change him!
Genie: Trying to show him a better life wasn't stupid, Al. [as Señor Wences] Leaving him alone with the parrot, that was stupid.
- Frozen:
- Frozen Fever: When Elsa catches a cold right as she's throwing Anna a birthday party, she apologies for "ruining" the birthday. Anna tells her, "You didn't ruin anything."
- In the second film, Elsa blames herself for her and Anna parents' death after finding out that they were trying to help her with her powers. Anna assures her that she isn't responsible for their parents' choices and death.
- How to Train Your Dragon 2: During the "I Know You're in There Somewhere" Fight, Hiccup apologizes to Toothless for lashing out at him after he killed his father while being controlled by Drago's Bewilderbeast.
Hiccup: It wasn't your fault, bud. They... made you do it. You'd never hurt him. You'd never hurt me. Please. You... are my best friend, bud. My best friend...
- The Incredibles 1: After they make it to Nomanisan, Violet apologizes for not obeying her mother in shielding the plane from the missiles, but Helen comforts her daughter and admits that she was wrong to ask that of Violet in such a stressful situation.
- The Land Before Time: After Littlefoot's mother is killed by Sharptooth, Littlefoot blames himself for what happened. An older dinosaur named Rooter overhears and consoles him once he realizes what's going on.
Rooter: Oh, it's not your fault. It's not your mother's fault. Now, you pay attention to old Rooter. It is nobody's fault. The great circle of life has begun. But see, not all of us arrive together at the end.
- Rio: When Blu and Jewel have gone missing, Linda bursts into tears and blames herself for Blu's disappearance. Tulio tells her it's not her fault, only for her to turn on him and say it's his fault for making her bring Blu here in the first place.
- Shark Tale: After Frankie is killed by a dropped anchor while trying to eat Oscar, Lenny blames himself because of why Frankie was there: to show his reluctant brother how to eat a fish like a "real" shark. Oscar tries to cheer him up by saying that he deserves all the blame, as he was the unfortunate fish that Frankie decided to chase.
- Trolls Band Together: Branch when he was a baby feels responsible for BroZone's concert being a disaster and that three of his brothers left was because of him, but Floyd assures him that this isn't his fault.
Films — Live-Action
- Good Will Hunting: Will and Sean confide in each other about their childhood abuse, Sean assures Will that he's not responsible for the abuse by telling him "It's not your fault" multiple times, causing Will to cry.
- Kingsman: The Golden Circle: Following the death of every other Kingsman agent, Eggsy and Merlin perform the "doomsday protocols" and have a toast for each of the fallen. They drink a lot, with Merlin becoming a weeping, drunken mess, claiming that what happened is all his fault. An equally tipsy Eggsy reassures him that it wasn't his fault, insisting that Merlin is "the best" and that without him, he "would have lost it a long time ago".
- Knives Out: In the Summation Gathering, Benoit Blanc reassures Marta that she didn't cause the medication swap that led to Harlan's death — as he demonstrates, she knew the medications well enough to grab the correct vial of clear liquid, even with the label altered, because "you are a good nurse!".
- The Scarlet Claw: Holmes and Watson, having just had a close encounter with Alistair Ramson, an escaped convict and killer, and know that innkeeper Emile Journet is one of Ramson's intended targets. They reach the inn to discover the body of Journet's teenage daughter, Marie, murdered by Ramson trying to get information on where Emile was hiding. Holmes somberly says, "I should have prevented this." Watson consoles him, saying, "You did all you could, Holmes."
- Star Trek: The Motion Picture: After a transporter malfunction caused by a faulty module kills two members of the crew, Kirk offers a brief consolation to Janice Rand, who was operating the Enterprise's transporter, "There's nothing you could have done, Rand. It wasn't your fault."
- Top Gun: The formal inquest into the loss of Maverick's plane, as well as the death of his partner, Goose, determines that Maverick was not at fault for the accident. Maverick unknowingly crossed into another plane's jet wash, robbing his engine of power and sending the F-14 into an irrecoverable flat spin. The decision to eject was the only and correct one, and Goose's death from striking the canopy on ejection was not something that could have been prevented in those circumstances. Hearing this does nothing to assuage Maverick's Survivor's Guilt.
Literature
- Ishura: After the catastrophe that unleashed Roto the Cross, Viga blames herself for failing to create Roto as she envisioned. As her only trusted ally, Enu comforts her by insisting the disaster wasn’t her fault, thinking someone must have sabotaged the project. He reminds her that she’s never truly failed before, and reassures her she’ll certainly succeed in creating something even better next time.
- Milly, Molly: In the Animated Adaptation's episode "Class Concert", Molly loses her voice. Milly blames herself, since she previously wished Molly wasn't singing in the eponymous class concert. Maude tells her, "Fiddlesticks! Of course you didn't make Molly lose her voice!".
- In the kids' book Was it the Chocolate Pudding?, a boy thinks his parents got divorced over an argument they had after he spilled chocolate pudding on his baby brother. He apologises to his mother for supposedly ending her marriage, but she tells him that she and her ex-husband actually got divorced because they were incompatible in general, not because of that one incident.
- Wings of Fire: Peril feels immense guilt for unintentionally giving Darkstalker his power back by burning his scroll and feels completely responsible for his rise to power. At the end of the tenth book, Clay, one of the former Dragonets of Destiny and the dragon she fell in love with, assures her that she had no idea what would've happened and that it could've happened to anyone, and that he still loves her.
Live-Action TV
- Blackadder: Played with in the special "Blackadder's Christmas Carol". Blackadder sets up a situation where Baldrick disguises himself as a poor old woman knocking at Prince George's door, hoping that the Prince will give her all his money. Before Baldrick appears, a woman does arrive asking for money, who is a genuine collector for charity, and the Prince gives her all his money, instead of giving it to Baldrick. When Blackadder finds out what happened, he says to Baldrick, "it wasn't your fault", and then punches him.
- Castle: In "When the Bough Breaks", a woman named Eliska Solkol is found murdered. It was quickly learned that she worked housekeeping at a high-end apartment building. She'd been let go after a complaint was filed by one of the tenants, a Mrs. Talbot. Mrs. Talbot had seen Eliska giving her son a lollipop, and was upset because she points out you don't give someone else's child candy without permission because they could be allergic or diabetic. She mentioned to the management that someone might have a word with Eliska about what is appropriate, and when she learns Eliska was murdered, she blames herself, saying it was never her intent for Eliska to be fired and that she must've gotten involved in something shady without a job. Beckett assures Mrs. Talbot that it's not her fault, but the fault of the person who killed Eliska. That person turns out to be Mrs. Talbot's husband, Dr. Talbot, who had, five years earlier, swapped his terminally ill baby with Eliska's in the maternity ward so his wife would never know their baby was born with a fatal genetic disorder. Eliska had worked out the truth after her "son"'s death and part of the reason she gave the Talbots' "son" the lollipop was to get a DNA sample from him.
- CSI: NY: In "Unspoken", two kids around 8 years old, Lonnie and Aimee, retrieve a gun they see a perp drop into a dumpster. Lonnie knows enough to remove the magazine, but doesn't realize there's still a bullet in the chamber. As they play with the gun, it fires, hitting Aimee in the stomach and she bleeds out before help can arrive. Later, heartbroken at the loss of his best friend but also nervous about his own fate, Lonnie asks the cops, "Am I going to jail?" They assure him that he won't because they know it was an accident. While he's somewhat relieved, it's obvious he's still grieving as he and his father walk away.
- Doctor Who: The Daleks are looking to open a Time Lord ark that is serving as a prison to thousands of Daleks, and the device requires the physical touch of a time traveler, which the Daleks, locked in their transport shells, cannot provide. During the ensuing chaos with the arrival of the Cybermen, Mickey accidentally makes contact with the ark, activating it. He profusely apologizes, but the Doctor reassures him, saying the Daleks would have switched off the Sun in order to try and open the ark, and so it needed to be done.
- Family Matters: In "I Should Have Done Something", Carl is grumpier than usual because it's the one-year anniversary of a robbery he'd responded to that ended with a hostage shot dead, something he believes wouldn't have happened had he obeyed his first instinct and fired instead of trying to reason with the robber. As he watches a recording of his TV interview from that night, Harriette sternly tries to get her husband to let go of his guilt.
Harriette: Listen to me, Carl. That was a year ago. It was not your fault.
Carl: I know that here. [points to his head] But the problem is... I'm not sure I know that here. [points to his heart] - Full House: In "The Last Dance", Jesse and Michelle open up to each other after Jesse's "Papouli" dies in his sleep while visiting the Tanners. Jesse reveals that he feels guilty because, after all the times his grandfather took care of him when he was a child, he couldn't do the same for him.
Michelle: It wasn't your fault. His heart was old.
Jesse: I know... But it still hurts. - House of Anubis: When Sibuna is first playing Senet, Fabian is the one calling the shots, and, not yet knowing the enemy patterns or the consequences of failure, makes a move that sends Nina into a trapdoor to suffer an unclear fate. Everyone is distraught, and Fabian in particular is a shattered, sobbing mess. Patricia immediately tries to calm him down, insisting that it's not his fault and that he just needs to focus so that they can escape the board and figure things out. This snaps him out of his funk enough to end the game, but he's an emotional, panicking mess for the rest of the episode regardless and briefly stops trusting his own judgement, recruiting Joy to lead the game instead, while the eventual captures of Alfie, Patricia, and Amber only compound the problem and make his guilt worse.
- Leverage: Inverted in "The San Lorenzo Job". Having already thwarted Big Bad Damien Moreau, Eliot has contacted an old General friend of his in San Lorenzo to get information on Moreau and the politician protecting him, Ribera. However, the call is interrupted when Moreau has the General abducted by Ribera's men. Moreau tells the team that he needed the General gone to help prop up Ribera, so don't blame themselves. Then he points out that he wouldn't have had access to the tracking software, Manticore, they used to track the General if the team hadn't taken out the developer earlier in the year, and wouldn't have had a line on the General if they hadn't contacted him.
- M*A*S*H: When Col. Potter's horse, Sophie, goes missing, Radar frets that he must have improperly locked up her pen. Potter quickly reassures Radar, saying he went out to brush Sophie the night before, and it must've been him. Radar is immediately relieved, but goes immediately back to fretting, because Sophie is still missing. In the end, it turns out that no one left the fence open. She was borrowed by a former Korean general who was once in the cavalry and wanted to feel like a soldier once again. Potter gifts the man Sophie. His daughter returns Sophie the next day, saying the General died that night, but was happy in the end.
- Moon Knight (2022): Steven finds out that his mother became abusive following the accidental death of his brother, Randall, due to the two of them playing in a cave that rapidly filled up with rain water. Ever since, Marc was tormented with the guilt that he was responsible for his brother's death. However, Steven reassures Marc that this wasn't his fault, as he was simply a child who didn't know better, and didn't mean for Randall to die.
- Monsters: The Lyle and Erik Menendez Story: In episode 4 ("Kill Or Be Killed"), when Lyle apologizes to Erik for molesting him since they were children, Erik tenderly hugs Lyle while reassuring his older brother that it wasn't his fault.
- Peacemaker: Chris has spent much of his adult life blaming himself for the death of his older brother Keith, who died when he fell backwards and hit his head against a rock while they were fighting. Late in the first season, Leota points out that Chris was only a kid, forced into fighting by his awful father, and he could not possibly have foreseen that one "lucky" punch would be able to kill Keith. It was very obviously an accident.
- Sesame Street: In a Very Special Episode, it's revealed that Abby's parents got divorced a while back. In a Flashback to when the divorce was recent, Abby worries that she caused it somehow, such as when she turned something of her mother's into a pumpkin. Gordon reassures her that it can't be her fault.
- Star Trek: The Original Series:
- After a particularly high toll of Red Shirt deaths in "The Apple", Kirk blames himself for going ahead with the exploration mission rather than exercising his discretion to withdraw from a mission that simply isn't worth the risk. Spock and Bones try without success to argue that the deaths weren't Kirk's fault.
- Stated bluntly in "Metamorphosis":
- Star Trek: The Next Generation: In "Hero Worship", a boy named Timothy claims he caused the accident that killed everyone else on his spaceship, his reasoning being that he bumped into a control panel just before the explosions started happening. Picard and Troi reassure him that this was just a coincidence, since the panels are designed to prevent such accidents.
- Torchwood: In "Exit Wounds", after learning from Jack that he let himself be buried as a form of penance for letting go of Gray's hand, John Hart tries to reassure Jack that it wasn't his fault. Jack doesn't seem to believe him, likely because Gray himself wasn't as forgiving of him.
- Torchwood: Children of Earth:
- In "Day Four", Jack reveals that he was responsible for letting the 456 have twelve children in exchange for a virus cure in 1965. After Ianto advises him to stand up against the 456 in response, Jack decides to do just that, but has no other plan other than talking the 456 into leaving the planet at Thames House, therefore blindsiding him when the 456 releases a virus into the building which fatally infects Ianto. As Ianto lies dying, Jack blames himself for getting him into this in the first place, but Ianto tries to assure him that it wasn't.
Jack: It's all my fault.
Ianto: No, it's not. - In "Day Five", as Jack prepares to beam away from Earth in a Self-Imposed Exile, he tells Gwen how he blames himself for the deaths of Steven, Ianto, Tosh, Owen, and Susie. Gwen tries reassuring him that none of it was his fault, but it is made clear that Jack's Guilt Complex is so strong that her words don't break through.
- In "Day Four", Jack reveals that he was responsible for letting the 456 have twelve children in exchange for a virus cure in 1965. After Ianto advises him to stand up against the 456 in response, Jack decides to do just that, but has no other plan other than talking the 456 into leaving the planet at Thames House, therefore blindsiding him when the 456 releases a virus into the building which fatally infects Ianto. As Ianto lies dying, Jack blames himself for getting him into this in the first place, but Ianto tries to assure him that it wasn't.
Video Games
- ANNO: Mutationem: Ann entirely blames herself for a past incident for losing control and accidentally attacking Ryan and inflicting an Eye Scream onto him. When the two reunite near the end, he states during his Anguished Outburst that she doesn't have to blame herself for what happened because he knew it was just an accident.
- Bulletstorm uses a variation ("I don't hold you accountable"). It's said by many characters (mainly pre-possession Ishi Sato and by the end of the game Trishka Novak) towards the protagonist Grayson Hunt, whose actions keep making the situation worse for everyone, however many of those actions are actually the machinations of General Sarrano, who's behind all of the events of the game.
- Dead Rising 2: If you fail to bring Katie some zombrex in time, she will zombify, leaving Chuck devastated over losing her. Stacey tries to assure Chuck he is not to blame for what happened, but Chuck is too overwhelmed with despair that when zombies break into the safe room, he doesn't put up a fight and allows them to kill him, resulting in the worst ending.
- Dragalia Lost: For a majority of the game, Zethia is possessed by Morsayati and causes suffering across the land. Even after she is freed, though, the damage she did during that time has caused her to be shunned by the general public. Most of Zethia's family does their best to assure her that she is not to blame for Morsayati's actions. Emile, on the other hand, tells her outright that she needs to take responsibility, which she acknowledges to be true regardless of whether she is at fault or not.
- Fire Emblem: Awakening: In the How We Got Here prologue, as Robin realizes they unwittingly wounded Chrom, he reassures them that it was not their fault and urges them to escape before collapsing.
- Injustice: Everyone assures Superman that, despite what he says and believes about himself, the Joker is the true perpetrator of the death of Lois Lane and their unborn child, along with the destruction of Metropolis from his machinations. Unfortunately, all of their assurance falls on deaf ears for Superman.
- Kingdom Hearts II:
- During the first visit to Land of Dragons, after Shan-Yu and the Heartless attack the camp while Sora's group is investigating a cave, Goofy and Ping feel that their group is held accountable, while Mushu feels like he alone is to blame. Sora and Donald tell them that it is not their fault, as the ones who caused the damage were Shan-Yu and the Heartless.
- Near the end of the first visit to Olympus Colosseum, after Sora's group and Hercules save Meg while unknowingly unlocking Hades' colosseum, Hades reveals that the Hydra Herc was fighting prior is still alive and has destroyed the Colosseum, causing Hercules to sink into a state of depression. The rest of the group does their best to assure Hercules that he is not at fault for what happened while they work together to finish off the Hydra.
- Lost Soul Aside: After Louisa's soul is stolen by the Voidrax in the prologue, Selene holds herself responsible for allowing Louisa to partake in Glimmer's mission, with Kaser responding that the matter wasn't her fault.
- Metroid Dread: When Samus enters Elun, she has to go through two layers of blast doors with scanners inbetween, and quickly finds out why the area is quarantined. After some exploration and boss fights, she approaches the exit only to find it wide open, and the X parasites are spreading out. Adam is quick to mention that it was the Big Bad who opened the doors.
- Ratchet & Clank: Up Your Arsenal: After Klunk's defeat, Clank apologizes and has himself at fault for getting captured and allowing the former to cause Qwark's presumed death until Ratchet reminds him that Nefarious is the one responsible.
Webcomics
- Cucumber Quest: Subverted. When Cucumber is mulling over his botched attempt to deal with the Nightmare Knight peacefully, Almond (who botched it) gets defensive and starts angrily demanding whether he blames her. He tries to say no but eventually admits that it really is her fault.
Almond: You're blaming me?
Cucumber: No—
Almond: You're saying it's my fault he attacked us? Is that it?!
Cucumber: Almond, calm down—
Almond: Shut up! I guess everything is just my fault, huh?!
Cucumber: Yeah. - Girl Genius: After Gil rescues Tarvek from a time bubble and catches him up on the last two years' worth of international disasters, Tarvek admits that he can't blame Gil for it. This is incredibly reassuring given that Tarvek would point out any fault in Gil if he could.
Tarvek: Well, if what you've told me is accurate, I must reluctantly conclude that the collapse of the Empire is not your fault.
Gil: I—that is—coming from you—that's very good to hear.
Web Videos
- Legends of Avantris: Subverted in Episode 21 of "Uprooted". Nestor had witnessed the horrific deaths of a mother and child in an accident, leading Bitsy to assure him that it wasn't his fault. However, it turns out he was the safety inspector, leading Bitsy to backtrack by pointing out his negligence was responsible for their deaths, meaning it is his fault.
- In Episode 3 of Sword Art Online Abridged, the expedition with the Midnight Black Cats gets everyone but Kirito (and Keita, but he's Driven to Suicide shortly after) killed. Sachi's last words are an attempt to reassure him that their misfortune is not his fault, but her laggy internet connection kicks in and turns it into his Trauma Button.
Western Animation
- Bluey: In "Sheepdog", when an overwhelmed Chilli tells Bandit she needs twenty minutes to herself, Bluey worries that she must have done something to upset her Mum enough to regret having children. Later in the episode, Chilli assures Bluey that she didn't do anything to upset her, and she explains to her that, sometimes, parents just need a little break from raising kids.
- Daria: In "Boxing Daria", a now-teenage Daria recalls a fight her parents had about her when she was a small child, and she wonders if many of the family's dysfunctional tendencies aren't her fault. Her parents finally confirm to her that her memory is accurate, that the fight did happen. However, as Jake explains to his daughter, he was frustrated with working for a Pointy-Haired Boss, and Helen tells Daria that she was the subject of the fight, not the cause of it. This has Daria reflect on the sheer number of times her parents were called in to the school to deal with her anti-social behavior, but Jake tells her that they'd long ago accepted this as part of what happens when you have a giftedly intelligent child, and that they've never regretted it.
- Dungeons & Dragons: Eric and Bobby have retrieved a sealed box known as the Box of Baelfyre, and Eric asks Hank if he can open it. Hank effectively gives permission, and Eric starts to open the box when Dungeon Master shows up and tells him to keep it closed, but it's too late. The box bursts open, sending out a signal that contacts an Eldritch Abomination Greater-Scope Villain who has scourged countless worlds. As the children and Dungeon Master flee for their very lives, Eric laments that he knows they're all blaming him. Dungeon Master actually stops to comfort Eric, pointing out that he had asked permission to open the box, and then looks meaningfully at Hank, stating that Eric was then given permission to do so. Eric is momentarily relieved, and Hank is chastened for taking his leadership role lightly.
- Futurama: Subverted in "The Sting". After Fry is stung to death by a space bee, Leela blames herself for it since she was the one who brought the bee aboard the ship. During Fry's funeral, Professor Farnsworth consoles her and tells her that's not the case, but...
Farnsworth: [to Bender, loudly] I'm lying to make her feel better!
Leela: [bursts into tears] - Hey Arnold!: In "Grandpa's Sister", it is revealed that Grandpa Phil had a falling out with his sister Mitzi over 70 years ago when their beloved dog Pooter was hit by a milk truck and had to be put to sleep. They argue over who's to blame for the incident; Mitzi blames Phil for not fixing the gap in the fence and Phil blames Mitzi for not filling in the hole that Pooter dug. Arnold intervenes, saying that what happened to Pooter sounded like an accident that neither of them could have done anything about, so it was nobody's fault.
- Little Bear: Staged in "Lucy's Okay" — the main characters are playing a game, pretending that Lucy (an inanimate doll) is dead. Duck says that it was her fault since she "killed" her by sitting on her, but Emily (Lucy's owner) says that it wasn't, it was her fault. Owl then says that it was his fault since he fell asleep while he was meant to be watching Lucy. Little Bear decides to just say that it's everyone's fault, or nobody's fault, so Emily says that it's nobody's fault.
- My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic: In "A Canterlot Wedding", the impostor Cadence reveals herself to be Queen Chrysalis leading a Changeling invasion of Canterlot, and she rubs it in the Mane Six's faces that her plan succeeded because they wouldn't believe Twilight that "Cadence" was evil. A mortified Applejack tries to apologize, but Twilight tells them not to be sorry because they fell victim to a lie, just like her and everyone else.
- My Little Pony: Equestria Girls – Legend of Everfree: When Twilight Sparkle tells Sunset Shimmer that she still feels personally responsible for nearly destroying the human world and Equestria as Midnight Sparkle during the Friendship Games, Sunset had to remind her that Principal Cinch was the one to blame for pressuring her into releasing the siphoned Equestrian magic that caused her transformation into Midnight Sparkle in the first place.
- The Owl House:
- Sometime before the events of "Through the Looking Glass Ruins", Willow asked Gus for help luring away a swarm of pixies. He conjured an illusion which angered them, causing them to attack her, and break her arm. In the Cold Open, he tells Luz about the injury, moaning about being unable to properly use his powers. She warmly reassures him that it was an honest mistake, and Willow is as tough as nails.
- In "Thanks to Them", Luz spends months haunted by the fact that she unknowingly taught Emperor Belos the draining spell with which he planned to wipe out all of witchkind. She believes that her friends will hate her if they found out she'd "helped" a genocidal witch-hunter and strongly considers not going back to the Demon Realm with them, but when they eventually learn the truth, they tell her it wasn't like that and that they still consider her their friend.
Hunter: You were tricked. That's what Belos does: he tricks people. If it weren't you, it would have been someone else, and then, there'd be no one left to fight back.
- Puff the Magic Dragon: Puff in the Land of Living Lies revolves around a girl named Sandy, who's fallen into a habit of compulsive lying as a way of masking her depression, brought on because she blames herself for her parents' divorce. By the end of the special, Puff has helped her admit how she feels and demonstrates to her that her claim of being the cause of their divorce is a "self-deceptive lie", reassuring her that her parents' separation was not her fault and that they still love her.
- The Real Ghostbusters: Referenced in "Citizen Ghost"; Peter is recounting to a reporter how Slimer came to live with the Ghostbusters, involving storing their original uniforms next to a crack in the containment unit. Uniforms Peter was instructed, but failed, to destroy.
- SpongeBob SquarePants: Crossed with Never My Fault in "Cephalopod Lodge". When SpongeBob and Patrick try to reason with Roger that Squidward's ban from the titular lodge was not his fault, Roger then asks whose fault it was. That leads to this exchange:
Patrick: Was it my fault?
SpongeBob: No, it wasn't your fault, Patrick.
Patrick: Thanks, SpongeBob. And it wasn't your fault either.
Roger: Well, if it wasn't your fault, and it wasn't Squidward's fault, whose fault was it?!
Patrick: Uh... maybe it's your fault.
[Roger looks briefly confused before shooing them away]
