Christ... I was FROZEN today!
—Charlie Wilcox
Suburban Commando is a 1991 sci-fi comedy film directed by Burt Kennedy and written by Frank Capello for professional wrestler Hulk Hogan. In it, Hogan plays Shep Ramsey (not to be confused with Chef Ramsay), an interstellar peacekeeper who loves justice but hates sitting around. After failing to thwart an evil plot by General Suitor (William Ball), Shep is contacted by his superior Zanuck (Roy Dotrice) while returning home in his ship. When Zanuck suggests he take a vacation, an annoyed Ramsey smashes his ship controls, discharging all of his ship's energy, forcing him to land on a planet and recharge his ship for six weeks. The planet? Earth. Hilarity ensues as he becomes neighbors with overall wimp Charlie Wilcox (Christopher Lloyd) and tries to understand Earthly customs... and contend with the forces of arch enemy General Suitor after Charlie fooled around with Ramsey's equipment, which had sent a signal to Suitor of Ramsey's location.
The film also stars Shelley Duvall as Jenny Wilcox, Larry Miller as Adrian Beltz, Jo Ann Dearing as Margie Tanen and Jack Elam as Colonel Dustin McHowell.
Burt Kennedy's last feature film.
Suburban Commando provides examples of:
- Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking:Deak: Do you have any idea what we are gonna do to you, if we find one itty, bitty scratch on 'em?Deak: What are you, nuts? This is the '90s. We're gonna SUE you.
- Badass Bystander: When Shep barges into the office and punches a clock to pieces, Margie the secretary gets to her feet, meets his eyes, and angrily tells him to take a seat. Later, when she sees him manhandling Charlie over Shep's missing suit, she pulls a gun out to make him stop. He was apparently impressed enough to want to get together with her offscreen.
- Badass in a Nice Suit: Since Beltz just happens to have a large amount of the exact type of crystal Shep needs to quickly fix his spacecraft, he and Charlie attend a soiree at Charlie's workplace to try stealing it when the bounty hunters finally close in on Shep, meaning he spends most of act III and all of the climactic action sequences decked out in a nice tuxedo (inevitable Clothing Damage notwithstanding).
- Big Bad: General Suitor.
- Blood Knight: Shep exhibits shades of this. He doesn't seem to like the idea of being off-duty for an extended period (though it ultimately does him good), preferring the most challenging mission he can get as soon as he can get it. And he's genuinely disappointed when the neighbors turn out to be threatening to sue rather than physically assault him. Maybe he just needs a vacation...
- Bounty Hunters: Hutch and Knuckles, the two thugs sent to track Ramsey down on Earth. Shep himself is a heroic version when he's on the clock.
- Brick Joke: After falling off a kid's skateboard, Shep angrily throws it so far that it vanishes into the horizon. Several scenes later, the two bounty hunters see the skateboard flying past their ship as they approach Earth's atmosphere.
- Burger Fool: The space thugs stop at a fast food place called "Surfin' Burger", and even the drive-thru voice talks like a Surfer Dude.
- Butt-Monkey: Charlie Wilcox.
- The Cameo: A young Mark Calaway (The Undertaker), then new to WWE, makes a cameo as a minion of Suitor.
- Cloudcuckoolander: Shep, and how.
- Epic Fail: The first time Ramsey gets on a skateboard, he slips and falls on his back.
- Everyone Hates Mimes: Well, Shep doesn't seem to, since he really thinks he's helping out someone in trouble, but his violent attempts to "assist" a hapless street mime are nevertheless played for laughs.
- Extreme Doormat: Charlie Wilcox, but he gets better.
- Feet-First Introduction: In the opening, the first thing we see of Shep is his boots as he is shooting down Suitor's men.
- Groin Attack: During the climax, Charlie uses one of Shep's gloves to deliver one of these to Suitor, triggering his One-Winged Angel form.
- Harmless Freezing: Shep accidentally froze Charlie with his freezer weapon. He was able to thaw him with little ill effect, but Charlie was not happy about it.Charlie: CHRIST! I was FROZEN today!
- Human Aliens: There don't seem to be any other kinds. At least not 'til the final battle.
- I Take Offense to That Last One:President: I will not ask my people to give up everything they know, to serve a sadistic, egotistical, homicidal maniac!General Suitor: I don't think I'm egotistical! Proud, maybe...
- Insignificant Little Blue PlanetShep: Earth? I hate Earth.
- Intimidation Demonstration: The two bounty hunters show off their strength by bending a piece of rebar and straightening it back out. Not to be outdone, Shep bends it into the shape a bunny rabbit, then tosses it aside and knocks one of the villains through the floor.
- Lampshade Hanging: During the battle between two bounty hunters of Suitor, Shep asks...Shep: What is this... a TAG-TEAM?!
- Even more hilarious is the follow-up:Shep: [After hearing the bounty hunter's child-like voice for the first time] No wonder you guys never talk!
- Even more hilarious is the follow-up:
- Lethally Stupid: The two boneheads who have a habit of inattentively speeding through the neighborhood in their sports car have apparently caused several near misses before, but when they nearly run over Charlie's son, Shep goes after them, wrecks their vehicle, and is looking to hand out a serious beatdown when Charlie intervenes. Excessive speeding in a residential area is already worthy of an ass-kicking, but these two idiots were so dangerously negligent that Shep logically assumed they were trying to hurt people.
- Literal-Minded:Secretary: Leave a message or take a seat. (Shep smashes a scale on her desk. Secretary stands up.) I said TAKE A SEAT![Shep returns with a seat]Secretary: Funny! That's real funny!
- Lower-Class Lout: Subverted with the burly neighbors led by Deak, as despite their appearances and mannerisms, they instead inflict retaliation by reasonably threatening to sue instead of what Shep expects from people like what Deak initially appeared to be.
- No-Gear Level: Non-gaming example. Shep can't use any of his weapons or equipment while vacationing on Earth because Suitor's minions are hunting him and can track him down using the power signature from his gear. Naturally, Charlie snoops around and activates the stuff anyway, putting the two bounty hunters right on Shep's tail. Why he still forgoes his gear even after it's clear the bad guys have found him is a question for the ages.
- No-Sell: Parodied, Shep delivers a two-handed chop to a bounty hunter's neck. The bounty hunter is completely unfazed. However a creaking noise is heard and both men look down to see that the force of Shep's attack transferred through the bounty hunter and compromised the floor underneath him. The bounty hunter has just enough time to give an Oh, Crap! face before falling through the ensuing hole.
- One-Winged Angel: General Suitor, but you don't see just how extreme it is until the climax. But you catch a glimpse of it at the beginning. It seems to happen only when he gets injured, as we saw him get his hand cut off and, later, punched in the groin with a powered gauntlet.
- Pac-Man Fever: Ramsey playing what is supposedly a space shooter at an arcade but is quite visibly After Burner (which has nothing to do with space and aliens, at all). The scene could have worked better had the producers licensed Sega's sci-fi arcade games like Galaxy Force or Space Harrier.
- Pointy-Haired Boss: Charlie Brewster has one that's the Glad I Thought of It-variety, with a generous helping of Professional Butt-Kisser to his Japanese clients, played by the trope's reigning master, Larry Miller.
- Running Gag: There are a few...
- A girl with a cat up a tree;
- Charlie trying and failing to run a traffic light while the other people on the road make it;
- ... and Shep's encounters with a mime.
- Running Gagged: The final gag of the film (the third time, too) is Charlie finally managing to race the traffic light while the others who were racing it have to hit the brakes, followed by him blasting the thing to smithereens with one of Ramsey's laser guns.
- Sent into Orbit Shot: When super-strong Human Alien warrior Shep Ramsey is challenged by a group of kids to try skateboarding, the board slips from under him and he lands on his back, prompting laughter and mockery from the kids. Angrily, he throws the board skyward with such force that it disappears from view. Some time later, as the two Bounty Hunters pursuing him are approaching Earth, they detect what turns out to be the skateboard flying through space, and look at one another in momentary confusion.
- Shout-Out: To quite a few sci-fi classics, such as when Ramsey asks if his next mission will be a "bug hunt with creatures that bleed acid."
- Smarter Than You Look: As shown in the Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking quote example above, Shep initially thought the three burly and nasty-looking neighbors who confront him were going to assault him for messing with their race car. However, in contrast to their Lower-Class Lout appearance, they state that they'd prefer to sue him for the damage to their vehicle rather than resort to violence.
- Those Two Guys: Two of the thugs that follow Ramsey to Earth.
- Well-Intentioned Extremist: Shep Ramsey, He nearly kills two teens for almost running over Charlie's son, unintentionally beats the crap out of a Mime under the belief that the Mime needs his help, and his general helping Charlie's family around the house.
- What the Hell, Hero?: Even though Shep succeeded in his mission to stop General Suitor in the opening sequence (or did he?), his superior makes note that the Shep Ramsay he's familiar with would have done everything he could to rescue the captive President Hashina before bugging out and destroying Suitor's ship, rather than leaving him to die.
- Wrong Genre Savvy: See the aforementioned Arson, Murder, and Jaywalking, Lower-Class Lout and Smarter Than You Look entries.
